In any potential relationship, without the beginning base of truth, trust cannot occur. Without the development of trust, respect will never be born. Without a level of respect for each other, a functional relationship of love and commitment will not seed and nourish. Intimacy occurs when we are willing to share ourselves completely with another in this order. It is the gift we get when we learn to engage in a balanced, loving relationship.
Know who you are
To ensure a happy married life, you must seek a 'compatible' life partner. In common terms, the word compatibility means "like minded" or someone who shares similar views, attitudes, habits, dreams, aspirations etc. Before u seek your 'alter ego' to spend the rest of your life with, ask yourself- Do you like who you are? Are you happy with your self-image?
Know what you want out of a relationship
Are you clear about what you want out of a relationship? Or, you've just been going around demanding things your friends and family members have advised you to seek in a relationship? Tell yourself the truth about what you want, not what others (family, friends, spouse) say you should have. Tell everyone else the truth about what you want. Don't be afraid to share your vision and dreams with those you love.
Be honest
Truth is the first pre-requisite for building trust in relationships. Respect is earned from trust, and love is earned from respect. Never put honesty at stake in any relationship by concealing facts or being apprehensive about the consequences of revealing the truth. Being truthful to yourself and to others and being able to communicate your emotions frankly is the only way to creating a bond of trust and harmony in a relationship.
Work on relationship
Remember there are no easy roads, no shortcuts in relationships. Every relationship is unique. Getting into a relationship might seem easy, but sustaining it for a lifetime requires one to constantly work on it. It takes two to form a relationship and if one of the person is in the habit of acting on his/her emotional impulses and rushing in and out of relationships without devoting it sufficient time and putting the blame on the partner, it only proves his/her own failure as a human being and reflects their incapability to understand the graph of successful and long-lasting relations in life. Be patient. Be kind. But most of all, be empathetic and understanding.
Live in the present
If you are both committed to creating a happy and harmonious relationship, agree to start doing it today, without any judgments or prejudices about the past. Instead of focusing on the problems, be willing to work on the solutions. Let go off your need to control the consequence of each decision you take; Live from moment to moment, one day at a time. The true joy of living can only be experienced in the present moment.
Be expressive
Appreciation and gratefulness have magic in them. Learn to express your feelings and convey your appreciation towards your partner. Never let a day pass by without saying or showing in some way how much your relationship and partner mean to you. Never take a moment for granted. Express how grateful you are for all the good times you've shared with him/her and how wonderful the future would be with him/her by your side.
Be sensitive
Any negative, hurtful or sarcastic remark is abusive and detrimental to the growth of a relationship. Like a sharp knife, each word will carve out a chunk of a loving relationship that can never grow back.
Before you open your mouth, try keeping yourself in your partner's shoes & consider the source and outcome of your remark(s).
Agree to disagree
Life is short. Don't waste it on arguments that have no meaning or purpose. If you are truly compatible, you must learn to 'agree to disagree' and dissolve your mutual differences in respect for each other's opinions. In this way, you can laugh about it, and go on to the next thing. After all, for you to be right, must your partner be necessarily wrong?
Be forgiving
To forgive and to seek forgiveness is the greatest of all human virtues. When you finally learn to say, "I admit I made a mistake" or "I am sorry", you get to finally hear you are O.K. Similarly, when you say, "It's okay, I forgive you", you are not only showing your partner how sensitive, compassionate & understanding you are, but also allowing him/her the freedom to confess and communicate his/her feelings openly to you without the fear of being misunderstood or unpardoned. In other words, by practicing forgiveness, you are allowing your partner to become your confidante and best friend.
Be unconditional
Unconditional love is easy to talk about but hard to practice in real life. It is an inner virtue that holds key to happy relationships and is indeed the foundation stone for all quality relationships. To accept your mate unconditionally just the way he/she is, rather than trying to change him/her according to your own expectations & for your own sake is what is meant by unconditional acceptance. Instead of constantly cribbing about what you dislike about your partner and loosing out on all the happiness and good times you can have, try looking at and valuing all the things you admire about him/her and which bind you together in a relationship. Don't forget each one of us have our own set of flaws and nobody is really perfect. Including you!
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http://www.shaadikaro.com/articles_doanddonts.asp
Know who you are
To ensure a happy married life, you must seek a 'compatible' life partner. In common terms, the word compatibility means "like minded" or someone who shares similar views, attitudes, habits, dreams, aspirations etc. Before u seek your 'alter ego' to spend the rest of your life with, ask yourself- Do you like who you are? Are you happy with your self-image?
Know what you want out of a relationship
Are you clear about what you want out of a relationship? Or, you've just been going around demanding things your friends and family members have advised you to seek in a relationship? Tell yourself the truth about what you want, not what others (family, friends, spouse) say you should have. Tell everyone else the truth about what you want. Don't be afraid to share your vision and dreams with those you love.
Be honest
Truth is the first pre-requisite for building trust in relationships. Respect is earned from trust, and love is earned from respect. Never put honesty at stake in any relationship by concealing facts or being apprehensive about the consequences of revealing the truth. Being truthful to yourself and to others and being able to communicate your emotions frankly is the only way to creating a bond of trust and harmony in a relationship.
Work on relationship
Remember there are no easy roads, no shortcuts in relationships. Every relationship is unique. Getting into a relationship might seem easy, but sustaining it for a lifetime requires one to constantly work on it. It takes two to form a relationship and if one of the person is in the habit of acting on his/her emotional impulses and rushing in and out of relationships without devoting it sufficient time and putting the blame on the partner, it only proves his/her own failure as a human being and reflects their incapability to understand the graph of successful and long-lasting relations in life. Be patient. Be kind. But most of all, be empathetic and understanding.
Live in the present
If you are both committed to creating a happy and harmonious relationship, agree to start doing it today, without any judgments or prejudices about the past. Instead of focusing on the problems, be willing to work on the solutions. Let go off your need to control the consequence of each decision you take; Live from moment to moment, one day at a time. The true joy of living can only be experienced in the present moment.
Be expressive
Appreciation and gratefulness have magic in them. Learn to express your feelings and convey your appreciation towards your partner. Never let a day pass by without saying or showing in some way how much your relationship and partner mean to you. Never take a moment for granted. Express how grateful you are for all the good times you've shared with him/her and how wonderful the future would be with him/her by your side.
Be sensitive
Any negative, hurtful or sarcastic remark is abusive and detrimental to the growth of a relationship. Like a sharp knife, each word will carve out a chunk of a loving relationship that can never grow back.
Before you open your mouth, try keeping yourself in your partner's shoes & consider the source and outcome of your remark(s).
Agree to disagree
Life is short. Don't waste it on arguments that have no meaning or purpose. If you are truly compatible, you must learn to 'agree to disagree' and dissolve your mutual differences in respect for each other's opinions. In this way, you can laugh about it, and go on to the next thing. After all, for you to be right, must your partner be necessarily wrong?
Be forgiving
To forgive and to seek forgiveness is the greatest of all human virtues. When you finally learn to say, "I admit I made a mistake" or "I am sorry", you get to finally hear you are O.K. Similarly, when you say, "It's okay, I forgive you", you are not only showing your partner how sensitive, compassionate & understanding you are, but also allowing him/her the freedom to confess and communicate his/her feelings openly to you without the fear of being misunderstood or unpardoned. In other words, by practicing forgiveness, you are allowing your partner to become your confidante and best friend.
Be unconditional
Unconditional love is easy to talk about but hard to practice in real life. It is an inner virtue that holds key to happy relationships and is indeed the foundation stone for all quality relationships. To accept your mate unconditionally just the way he/she is, rather than trying to change him/her according to your own expectations & for your own sake is what is meant by unconditional acceptance. Instead of constantly cribbing about what you dislike about your partner and loosing out on all the happiness and good times you can have, try looking at and valuing all the things you admire about him/her and which bind you together in a relationship. Don't forget each one of us have our own set of flaws and nobody is really perfect. Including you!
------------------------------------
http://www.shaadikaro.com/articles_doanddonts.asp
